. . . from AfraShe Asungi, LCSW, MSW, MFA ~

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Our April ~ Aug Featured AFTTM Article :

Are You an Introvert & Proud To Be One?

On The Matter of

The Hidden Gifts Of Being Introverted . . .

by AfraShe Asungi, LCSW, MSW, MFA ~ April, 2011

Having had to learn to SheCreate a viable lifestyle that jived with and enhanced my own unique gift of introverted "being" very early in my own life [as I imagine others have also had to do]; upon coming across this topic on a peer chat site, I was clear that this was a topic VERY close to my own heart. And as such, an area of specialty that has piqued my interest from a very personal place, since it was the first time I had encountered this particular Inner Character Strength identified as a social and transpersonal "gift" rather than as a social "burden".

While I am clear about the ways that my gift has guided my life path, I have also found that others [who were extraverts] were forever attempting to "convert" me into a more public lifestyle. The following articles will offer insight to all and any who are family, friend or colleague of my co-introverts, that they may gain greater insight in how to encourage and appreciate the gifts of being a more inwardly-centered being. I'm also including the web address of the original article source . . . Enjoy . . .

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'Hidden Gifts Of Introverted Child' ~ Insight And Advice For Parents Of Introverts

NEW YORK, March 6, 2006 by Polly Leider

Having an introverted child can be a cause for concern. Some parents worry that their kids will be left behind because of a lack of social skills. Author, Dr. Laney offers advice in her new book.

Author Marti Olsen Laney on The Early Show (CBS/ EARLY SHOW)

(CBS) Having an introverted child in today's fast-paced world can be a cause for concern. Often misunderstood as shy, rather than introverted, this personality type requires a little special attention and understanding.

A new book, "The Hidden Gifts of the Introverted Child," offers insight into the special talents of introverts and offers parents some valuable advice. Author Marti Olsen Laney joined The Early Show on Monday to discuss the book with co-anchor Rene Syler.

Laney outlined some of the characteristics shared by most introverts.

• They enter new situations slowly
• They speak softly and sometimes hunt for words
• They need time alone to re-charge
• They have one or two good friends

Olsen also emphasizes that introverted children should not be confused with shy children.

"Shyness is really when your threat system is easily triggered so that you feel afraid or threatened by people or situations," she explained. "So either extroverts or introverts could be shy and, actually, more extroverts are shy."

What separates introverts from extraverts is their reaction to social situations. While extraverts thrive on social interaction, introverts are exactly the opposite. "Everything they do in the outside world takes energy, drains energy," Olsen said. "For extroverted kids, everything they do in the outside world gives them energy. That makes a big difference for people."

Olsen offered tips for how parents can help their introverted children thrive and make the most of their hidden talents.

Don't try to turn your introverted child into an extrovert
"They are hard-wired, their brain and nervous system, so that they have a certain temperament and it affects a lot more areas than just socializing," she said. That includes "sleeping, eating, how they do homework, how they learn, how they behave in school."

Speak like an introvert
"Most parents will be extroverted, since there are many more extroverts than introverts," Olsen pointed out. "It's important for them to learn to slow down, pace, have silences, don't finish their sentences don't fill in words and listen a lot more. And don't expect them to talk after school, because they are pooped."

Be prepared for the party
"A party is very over-stimulating for them. Even if it's a good friend, you can expect them to need to ease into the party, stand and observe," said Olsen. "Any kind of social event, they'll need to stand on the sidelines and observe so they can kind of get their energy calmed down, and it's really good to have them rested and be sure they have protein beforehand."

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An Excerpt From, "Introverted Child" by Marti Olsen Laney

March 2006, By Polly Leider

"Helping Your Innie Child Reap Introvert Advantages

Wisdom is the quality that keeps you from getting into situations where you need it. ~ Doug Larson

Because of the way they're hardwired, innie children are primed to enjoy the following twelve advantages. Parents can give these children a helping hand so that they can understand and use their potential strengths and brainpower. If they can embrace these advantages and learn to use them in positive ways, introverted children will be well on their way to forging a fulfilling life path.

1. Introverts Have Rich Inner Lives

Do you believe in God? seven-year-old Adam asks me when we meet. He goes on to say, My family isn't religious, but my friend Kesah goes to church every Sunday. I respond to his interest in religion and say, Yes, I do. Sounds like you are wondering about God and what other people believe. People all over the world have many different religious beliefs. I'm still thinking about it, he says. I can almost see the little wheels turning inside his head. I'm sure you will decide what you believe, I add.

Introverted children know they have an interior world. It is ever present and alive for them. Rather than constantly turning to others, they rely on their interior resources to guide them. In their private garden away from the material world they concentrate and puzzle out complex and intricate thoughts and feelings. This allows them to engage with the deeper aspects of life.

MMVI, CBS Broadcasting Inc. All Rights Reserved.

Much thanks to CBS News for the original post at:
http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2006/03/06/earlyshow/leisure/books/main1374984.shtml

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What Are Typical Indicators Of Being An Introvert?

Dr. Laney offers some pretty useful information along with a Self-Assessment that can help you to determine whether you or your loved ones are introverts: **

We all use both our introverted and extroverted skills, but we are hard wired to be more one than the other. Look at the lists below and determine which one feels more like YOU! Not every aspect will fit exactly for you because we are all unique. If you don't feel like you fit one side more than the other, even by 51% to 49%, then ask yourself this question:

If there is an emergency do you tend to stand still and feel somewhat shutdown or in slow motion? If you have a standstill reaction to stress more often, then you are probably an introvert.

In a crisis do you tend to move your body immediately and feel like taking action, maybe without pausing to think? Then you are probably an extrovert if you react with movement. Under stress we can experience our innate temperament.

Look over the two lists and think about how you ARE, not as you'd like to be. If your still uncertain, as a last ditch effort, ask someone you trust and who is honest to read these and suggest which one sounds more like you.

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Introverts

• Enjoy time alone
• Consider only deep relationships as friends
• Feel drained after outside activities, even if they were fun
• Good listener
• Appear calm and self-contained
• Think then speak or act

Extraverts

• Like to be in the thick of things
• Relish variety
• Know lots of people, considers lots of people friends
• Enjoy chit-chatting, even to strangers
• Feel stoked after activity
• Speak or act then think OR think while speaking

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Our February  Featured AFTTM Article :

An Evidentiary Cause to Pause?

On The Matter of

Potentially Over-Diagnosing ADHD . . .

by AfraShe Asungi, LCSW, MSW, MFA ~ February~March, 2011

Well, wherever your thinking regarding this matter, I trust that this article will [as it has recently brought me to do] also cause you to pause to simply revisit the apparent fluidity and co-occurrences between ADHD, Bi-Polar, and Autistic diagnoses. I'm also including the web address of the original article source . . .

Common Conditions Mistaken for ADHD
By Justine van der Leun

Nearly 10 percent of children and 4 percent of adults in the U.S. have been diagnosed with ADHD. But studies suggest that while many people with ADHD still go undiagnosed, others are wrongly diagnosed with ADHD when they are instead suffering from a range of other disorders.

The most common cause of misdiagnosis is a misunderstanding of what ADHD really is, according to Dr. Russell Barkley, clinical professor of psychiatry at the Medical University of South Carolina and author of "Taking Charge of ADHD: the Complete, Authoritative Guide for Parents."

"People rather superficially see that someone has difficulty paying attention and think they may have ADHD," he says.

"But the differential diagnosis of ADHD is not based on inattention -- it's based on the other deficits that go along with inattention: lack of self control, heedlessness, recklessness, thoughtlessness, an inability to think of what you're doing before you do it."

So which conditions are most often mistaken for ADHD, and how can such misdiagnoses be avoided?

Autism
"ADHD is rarely misdiagnosed as autism, but sometimes autism can be misdiagnosed as ADHD in its early stages," says Barkley. That's because the two conditions overlap, according to studies. Forty percent of autistic children have ADHD, and a portion of ADHD children have some autistic traits.

Parents and practitioners often pick up on one condition but not the other. Barkley cautions parents and doctors to look for the signs of autism.

Children with autism are not merely inattentive: They may have problems with language, stand too close to others, find social situations awkward or completely uninteresting, be unable to make eye contact, or engage in behaviors like hand flapping.

Bipolar Disorder
ADHD symptoms are present in people suffering from bipolar disorder, especially during the manic phase of the illness. "Don't focus on ADHD symptoms because the ADHD symptoms are present," says Barkley, referring to the ADHD triad of inattention, hyperactivity and impulsiveness -- all of which emerge when a person with bipolar disorder has a manic episode. "Instead, focus on emotional and social symptoms of manic episodes."

These symptoms, which are unique to bipolar disorder, include elation, grandiosity, sleeplessness and an extremely positive mood state, followed by a crash during which the person is irritable, depressed, withdrawn and explosive for hours or days.

The age of onset also determines the diagnosis, since symptoms of bipolar disorder usually emerge when a person is in late adolescence or early adulthood, while ADHD's onset is in childhood.

That said, there's a significant overlap of the two. A 2003 study at Massachusetts General Hospital of 51 adult ADHD patients found that 24 of the patients also had bipolar disorder. According to Barkley, the earlier the onset of bipolar disorder, the more likely that it will be accompanied by ADHD:

"If bipolar disorder starts in adulthood, only 20 to 25 percent of people will have ADHD with it," says Barkley. "If the bipolar disorder starts during teenage years, 45 to 50 percent have ADHD along with that bipolar disorder. And if your bipolar starts in childhood, 80 to 97 percent of those cases will have ADHD with it."

Older people may believe they have ADHD when they are merely entering the later stages of life. "They hear ADHD is an attention disorder, and they think they have it," says Barkley. The fact is, women and men in their mid-50s and early 60s may, for the first time in their lives, arrive late to appointments or forget about commitments.

They may walk downstairs and then have no clue why. But feeling foggy or forgetful isn't ADHD -- it's just normal aging. ADHD has an onset before 16 in nearly all cases. Older people (especially menopausal women) may be inattentive, but they are almost never hyperactive or restless, and they don't experience problems with inhibition. "A clinician may call this late-onset ADHD, and they'd be wrong," says Barkley.

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Much thanks to AOL Health for the original post at:

http://www.aolhealth.com/condition-center/adhd/common-conditions-mistaken-for-adhd?ncid=webmail

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What Are Typical Symptoms For ADHD?

The most typical symptoms of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) include:

* Inattention, which is having a short attention span and being easily distracted.
* Hyperactivity, which is inappropriate or excessive activity.
* Impulsivity, which can cause a person to do dangerous or unwise things without thinking about the consequences.

While these symptoms are noted to affect people in all age groups who have ADHD, typical behavior varies by age. In preschool-age children, symptoms may be harder to identify. Normal behavior in young children periodically include all of the major symptoms of ADHD. ADHD is usually distinguished from normal behavior by the severity and consistency of symptoms.

Children between the ages of 6 and 12 usually expected to exhibit more obvious signs of ADHD than other age groups. For some children, school is the first setting where academic performance and socialization abilities are identified and assessed. But it often is more difficult to detect ADHD when inattention is the primary symptom and the child is otherwise well-behaved. The presence of ADHD may be indicated by:

• Socialization problems and feeling rejected by peers.
• Dislike of school and frustration with school work.
• Low grades or test scores, including achievement tests.
• Poor organization and study skills.

Teens between the ages of 13 and 18 can sometimes be in better control of disruptive behavior related to hyperactivity, but other problems which began in earlier years may continue or become worse when ADHD is not treated. Teens with inattention problems who previously managed to cope may start to fall behind in schoolwork. This is especially true when major changes occur, such as starting at a new school or going to college.

Symptoms of ADHD in adults may not be as noticeable. Many adults with ADHD have not been diagnosed and treated. They can develop problems such as depression and difficulty keeping a job.

Do keep in mind that there are several other conditions with symptoms similar to ADHD. For example, sometimes bipolar disorder and ADHD can be confused. It can be hard to know whether symptoms are caused by ADHD, another condition, or both.

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Our Inaugural January AFTTM Article :

Simple Ways to WellBalance™ Acute Stress Symptoms:

A Website That Assists Us to

Simply Pause & Do Nothing for Two Minutes . . .

by AfraShe Asungi, LCSW, MSW, MFA ~ January, 2011

H eres a rather novel way for all classic extreme internet users totake a [meditational?] breather, to momentarily "de-stress" and Do Nothing during those days when we've clearly spent a way too much time online . . .

This site was apparently created as an online meditation middle-ground for anyone who doubts that they are, in fact, spending far too much time on their electronic toys. One major recommendation today for reducing many stress-related symptoms is meditation. However, a great many electronic devices-dependent wimmin, who has tried to attune to the recently popular curative art of meditation can tell you its not as easy as it seems.

Particularly since its so much easier to zone-out via the Internet, portable games, smart phones, and endless television and movies we can watch. For those seeking a meditational middle-ground, there is even a website where you can stay connected to your favorite devices while mindfully [or is it mindlessly?] doing absolutely nothing for two [whole] minutes, which, as we know can be a life time for any serious internet user.

According to Alex Tew, the sites creator:

I had been thinking how we spend every waking minute of the day with access to an unlimited supply of information, to the point of information overload. I also read somewhere that there is evidence that our brains are being re-wired by the internet, because we get a little dopamine kick every time we check our e-mail or Twitter or Facebook and there's a new update. So were all developing a bit of ADD. Which is probably not great in terms of being productive.

Of course, it goes without saying that I recommend that you continue to endeavor to regularly taking a be still and do nothing stress reduction break from it all, but in the meantime, if you know you're just not there yet, heres a another middle-ground way to developing your capacity to be still, stop the mind stimuli long enough to allow your mind/body to gain some relief from those things we cant easily refrain from, as internet columnist, Jamie Frevele has so humorously shared:

Truth is, its not hard to do nothing for two minutes, sitting back and listening to waves while keeping your hands off your computer. But then again, not everyone does yoga. Some people just cant sit still. There's an email to check, a text to answer, a site possibly updating and that's why we all need to give this a try. Seriously go try it.

Here's Our Additional WellBalance™ Suggestion for How you can Develop a Few Simple Relaxation and Stress Reduction Tools As Well As Your Willingness to Regularly Use Them:

So, here's what you can also do . . . for every day you spend 4 hours or more on your electric devices / internet, etc, commit to spending a 2-min session on this site, until you are ready to go to a real body of water [lake river, or ocean or even about 30 minutes in a quite bath will suffice]. And when you find that you're actually enjoying this taking these moments to simply be still, then take the next step by adding short, 15 minute meditations a minimum of 2-3 times a week or on those days when you're really stressed out [ so you can do it at lunch time or even just before you go to bed after a stressful day . . .].

But for now, until you've successfully built up enough stamina for the above, you can just commit to beginning with the plan of regularly semi-de-stressing by taking time to, Do Nothing for Two Minutes . . . by following through with a regular commitment to not doing at http://www.donothingfor2minutes.com . . .

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. . . Innovative Womin-Affirmative™

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Changing

Counseling Services 

. . . Tell me, I forget . . .

Show me, I recall . . .

Engage me, I comprehend . . .

Encourage me, I progress . . .

Nurture me, I flower  . . .

Enlighten me, I shine . . .

SheInspire™ me, I excel . . .

               AfraShe Asungi, HHHAS, LCSW

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